The Quarter Just Gone

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Well.

Last quarter just gone (Happy new year to y’all). To give you some sort of insight into how it went, I shall use the following play which I have a feeling will struggle to make any sense whatsoever.

The part of Señor Woody shall be played by Gatesy from Tripod, being played today by me. The part of Mr. IMO2 shall be played by Noiseworks Jon Stevens, being played today by me. All incidental characters are being played by Wayne Brady, of “Whose Line Is It Anyway?” fame, being played today by me. Anyway…

Begin

Scene 1

Señor Woody is rather stressed out, he has been working solidly for two weeks to ensure that the evil government get the right numbers to give the money to continue our services. Mr. IMO2 has spent the last two reading the news and generally not doing any work.

Today is the day that the reports are due to come in. Señor Woody has only had 2 hours sleep the night before due to a burgeoning malaise We join our players at the beginning of the day…

Mr. IMO2: mumble mumble…mumble…fuel database…mumble…are the reports…mumble…ready to be run? mumble

Señor Woody: Um, no. There is still some stats to come in.

Señor Woody (to himself): Which you would know if you actually did work.

Mr. IMO2: mumble…mumble…would you like me to run them? mumble

Señor Woody: Nah, it should be right. I’ll wait till they are all ready then run them and send them off.

Mr. IMO2: mumble…ok…mumble…I will run them next quarter…mumble

End Scene

Scene 2

Two hours after the first scene, Señor Woody’s health has taken a turn for the worse. It appears as though he will have to go home. Our hero goes to the overlord of IT, Mr. Hawk, to discuss the situation.

Señor Woody: Hey buddy, I’m feeling pretty shocking, so I’m going to go home and try and get better.

Mr. Hawk: Thats ok. Do you think Mr. IMO2 will be able to cope?

Señor Woody: Seriously, a trained monkey could do what I have left.

Mr. Hawk: Ok then, you get better then.

End Scene

Scene 3

Our hero, Señor Woody, has returned to work after 2 days off sick, still half out of it, but knowing that he needs to be there to make sure it has all gone correctly. Mr. IMO2 has gone to Melbourne for a meeting. The phone rings…

Señor Woody: Hello, this is Señor Woody.

Phone Caller: Hi, I got Mr. IMO2 to fix something up for me yesterday, and now my appointments have disappeared.

Señor Woody: …O_o. Fuck. I’ll fix that up for you…

30 minutes later in Mr. Hawk’s office.

Señor Woody: Hey boss. Mr. IMO2 fucked up.

Mr. Hawk: I was afraid that was going to happen. Can you fix it?

Señor Woody: I have fixed it, but this is ridiculous.

Mr. Hawk: OK, how about you write an email that you want me to send him, and I will copy and paste it and send the email from me.

Señor Woody: Lazy bastard.

Fin

So anyways, the upshot is, my boss is too lazy/scared to yell at him, so I get to continue to fix up his fuck ups, and stress out and cause myself yet more illness. And a note for you all, Gastro is not fun at all. 2 nights of no sleep and no food for 2 days really fucks you up.

So keep on keeping on people. And if those Indians win I’m going to go through monkeys at their team hotel for a few hours.

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